Never say never

My 10 year high school reunion is next weekend. I'll spare you doing the complicated mathematics - that means I'm 28 years old. For some reason, having a reminder of how long it's been since I was a minor makes me remember of all the thinks I thought I would accomplish at that age. And, surprisingly, there are many things on my end-of-high-school-life's-to-do-list that I have been able to accomplish.

There's also that informal list I always kept filed away in the recesses of my brain of things I would NEVER EVER do. But let's be honest, I've done them. So here is the Reader's Digest version of the list of things that as recently as 10 years ago I said I'd never do and now I have.

I said I'd never . . .

• get fat (what's this 'exercising' you speak of?)
• yell at my kids (alright, I'm not the perfect mom as you all believed)
• have my kids behave badly at the grocery store (obviously, my kids aren't perfect either, dang it)
• yell at my husband (no one in this house is perfect)
• tell my husband I wanted to kill him (with only the most affectionate use of sarcasm, of course)
• let my kids wear 'crocs' (I still think they're fugly, but the kids love 'em & they're cheap so I've caved)
• stop coloring my hair lighter (it's SOOO dark against my transparently white skin when it's the natural color, which I've now gone back to)
• take an accounting class (how lame do you have to be to take accounting . . . oh, wait)
• wait for/write to a missionary (kinda, sorta, we're going with it)
• learn to like Ikea (yes, I've converted - darn those great prices!)
• purchase clothing at Wal-Mart (come on, we've all done it)
• move away from my parents (anyone remember that apartment my dad paid for for an entire school year that I refused to move into in college? good times)
• have any need for products like Metamucil & Preparation H (come on mommies, don't pretend you don't know what I talkin' about)
• go more than 2 days without shaving my legs (as long as it's not long enough to braid, I don't see an issue)
• be super paranoid about safety & security like my mom (totally, totally guilty - it's normal to check the locks 18 times each night, right?)
• live somewhere hot (Toby told me Phoenix was only mildly warmish)
• can my own fruit, salsa, sauces, etc. (isn't that something grandmas do?)

Anyone else fail to live up to your "I Said I'd Never"s?

Our personal ad

No one really wanted to see pics from our vacation to Utah, right? Didn't think so.

If you read my random thoughts on facebook, you'll know I'm in the market for new friends. We've lived in AZ over 2 years now and the only people we hang out with is my SIL Kenlynne's family. We ADORE them, but they're likely getting sick of us calling twice a week, so I've decided we should probly branch out a little.

So, unbeknownst to my husband, we are going to begin dipping into the couples dating pool. And I don't mean that in a dirty way - we're not swingers or anything. But I consider making new couple friends as complicated as dating.

Think about it for a minute. I have to find a gal I enjoy talking with about various subject matter. To be honest, that's not that difficult since I like most people and I assume most people like me. Maybe I'm wrong, but for the sake of this post, we'll assume people generally don't think I'm totally heinous. So this step is the easy part.

Next, Toby has to be able to hang out with the gal's significant other, typically the husband. Again, Toby's a pretty easygoing guy so it's not that hard to find someone he likes to talk to. HOWEVER, Toby is what I would call antisocial. I'm a people person. Toby . . . not so much. I look forward to getting together with friends on the weekends. He doesn't. I would love to have parties at our house twice a month. He'd rather be shot. Anytime we do go anywhere or have people over (which is rare) he does enjoy it, but it's like pulling teeth to get him to agree with the plan in the first place. It's a little tricky. But pretty much anyone who can even remotely be bothered to watch a BYU game, he's all for.

Beyond that hurdle, I have to at least tolerate being around the other guy and Toby has to think the other girl is not a total idiot. Meshing 4 personalities is surprisingly difficult. This is all before you even approach the topic of finding things to do together that you all enjoy and doesn't cost a ton of money because, let's face it, who has the money to go out and do elaborate things each week. And, if you're not on a similar economic footing, it gets more complicated because if the other couple is rolling in the dough, we will feel like idiots for having what I would call an average income.

So, after I like the girl and Toby likes the guy, and I like the guy and Toby likes the girl, and I get Toby to leave the house or get him to unbarricade the front door for 10 minutes to let people in, and we all find something to do that we enjoy that doesn't cost an arm and a leg, and the other couple doesn't make 6+ figures a year, THEN you have to factor in children. Our kids go to bed at 8 and then I'm on house arrest. They need to go to bed at 8 and so that's what we do. I, however, do not need to go to bed at 8. Furthermore, everyone else who has kids is pretty much out of commission after the 8:00 mark too.

So then, if you find the TIME to do something you previously determined you all enjoy that doesn't cost a lot of money, and it can happen before 8 pm, it's helpful if the other couple has kids the same or similar ages to my kids. If Tysen's bored, it ain't pretty. So now, we add 2 more people (my kids) and some other number of kids (the other couple's kids) to the list of humans that need to get along with one another and co-mingle in a positive way.

Seriously, this is too much work. So, if you're interested in us as couple friends, here's our personals ad for couple's dating:

MWC (married white couple) seeking CILTR (couple in long term relationship, marriage not a prerequisite) W~2K (with approximately 2 kids) preferred. We enjoy pina coladas (virgin) and long walks on the beach. We don't do stuff on Sundays (being Mormon and all). We're into sports, especially BYU football, but nearly any sport will do (and NASCAR is not a sport under our definitions) University of Utah fans need not call. Must be able to handle strong sarcastic undertones to nearly every communication. Good sense of humor required. For a good time call Emily's phone (cuz we all know Toby won't answer)